It was so hard to get out of bed this morning, I had such a stressful day yesterday. I didn't want to face another day like that. Sometimes motherhood is the world greatest thing, and other times I want to hide under the covers and come out when they are all grown up!
I feel it was easier to look after them when they were babies, then it is now that they are kids. Babyhood was awesome and I miss those days...sure I had no sleep, not a moment to myself and didn't get out of my pajama's some days. But I knew what to do, I really felt all that unconditional love. The bond between my children and I was so strong. I loved breastfeeding, and didn't really mind those days where I would get nothing done. I even loved co-sleeping with all my babies when they were small.
But now I lack confidence, no idea what I am doing. I hate handing out discipline, and know it must be done. Removing a toy, no TV or iPod! I don't like smacking. Some days it feels like scream and shout all day long and when they are all finally in bed I am upset and angry with myself.
I wonder if there is a easy way, a solution, a special way to parent, or even a book to read? What's happening right now really isn't working. I will drive myself crazy with all this guilt!
I just want a happy home - with happy children
13 comments:
good lord love i am a stressed out Mum to a farm load of Animals & most days i cant cope :P ... so with 3 kids it is highly understandable for u to be overwhelmed xox
..... my kids have moved 150kms away so i hardly ever see them :(
It's a tough one...
I have found that as they get older the emotional stress of answering questions, having arguments about the silliest of things, having to repeat yourself a gazillion times, and all the rest, catches up with you at some stage! I think us Mums need a good w/e away every now and then. You know, to recharge the patience! ha ha....
You are not alone!
Keep taking your gorgeous photo's, because they capture the best of everything! xx
Kelly don't get too angry with yourself. Being a parent I feel is so much harder now that the girls have grown much harder than when they were little. I try and be as organised as I can, have a good routine and be as consistent as I can but even that doesn't always work. Take care and hopefully soon calmer seas return to your home. I hope you get some time to chill and write things down, that can help. xo
My kids had me in tears the other night and to top everything off, I had no voice which was seriously frustrating. I too loved the baby days and I am just starting to come out of that stage. I am already missing it. Keep going strong, and know you aren't alone.
xxx
I often think back to the days when we had new borns in the house and crave those days. I agree...life has become increasingly hectic and busy as my little ladies have grown up. We have days like these...that are simply exhausting. But then you plonk youself down in bed and remind youself ....tomorrow is a new day.
I hope tomorrow is a new day for you.
xoxox
it is such a journey - I think it's why grandparents always seem so calm, they've had their practise kids and can now do it right!
Accept that it's overwhelming, and scary and awful. But it's also beautiful and warm and loving and filled with hugs and kisses. Maybe just not today...
But it is all worth it - because they are worth it.
xxxCate
I think you will find you are a normal mum of 3 kiddies :-) Don't beat yourself up. xxx You might like thegreenparent forum who usually have some great ideas for other forms of living with your kiddies without going crazy.
These kinds of days/weeks/months won't last forever. Honest. Hang in there.
this is totally not the magic solution but it is a GREAT article that i'm sure you'll like!
http://thegypsymama.com/2011/05/for-when-youre-tempted-to-just-lose-it-with-your-kids/
I agree - sometimes being a mum is wonderful and sometimes, well sometimes it just sucks - it can be SO hard.
I don't have any magic solution but I do know from all of your posts that I have read that you seem like a great mum!
Reading your blog lends me thinking we are living in a parallel universe. I also have 3 kids, mine are 8, 5 and almost 3 - and believe me, you are in no way alone. You mentioned you wonder if there is a book etc that might help. Only because I have been looking out for the same type of help and stumbled across a book about a month ago. I'm not a buddhist but the blurb on the back of a book by Sarah Napthali, The Complete Buddhism for Mothers grabbed my attention. It said "Parenthood can be a time of great inner turmoil for a woman, yet parenting books invariably focus on nurturing children rather than the mothers who struggle to raise them." So that got my attention. It's 3 of this woman's books all in one and I am finding it so helpful in looking at things differently. It's not geared at turning you buddhist but focuses on using the principles to bring calmness and coping strategies. I am no where near finished but am already finding a real difference in how I am coping with things.
Oh I feel like this too, Kelly, I really do. Some days I go to bed, "scared" of what the next day will bring. Much love to you.
I couldn't agree more. I'm loving your photographs Kelly. They're all so beautiful!
xx
Post a Comment